by hope | Apr 2, 2019 | Inspirational
5 Ways to boost self-confidence.
On April 6th I get to celebrate 35 years of life, love and walking down this path we call life!
Why be shy about it?
Why hide it?
Why down play this celebration of life?
Why not shine like the bright star you are?
This was not always my style of thinking. I use to be uncomfortable with the thought of shining too bright. I use to worry others would notice me and because I would be noticed, others would judge me.
That people would criticize me, and because they didn’t know my whole story…get the wrong idea that yes, I am a recovering addict. But I am successfully in recovery (well always working on myself). Except, even though I clawed my way into recovery, I still lacked the self-confidence to let my light shine bright.
In 35 years I have learned a lot.
In 35 years I have slowly come to a place were I am OK with who I am.
And more importantly, I am less concerned with what others think.
Let me explain.
My entire life I have been WAY TO FOCUSED on what others think of me, my choices and life, and as a result my self-confidence was zilch.
I would run myself into the ground trying to please others and often time end up depleted, frustrated, and rundown.
It wasn’t until a few years ago that I truly began to understand this is no way to live and no way to get ahead in life and as only killing my self-confidence at every pass. And it was around that time which I realized this entire approach to life was a learned behavior that I could in fact… unlearn.
To say that the process of breaking such a habit would be as easy, would be a lie.
Slowly, taking one situation at a time I have grown to a place where I am more confident, where my self-confidence shines more each day. I care about others, respect others, but no longer am willing to sacrifice my happiness and or my desire to walk the path my Creator has set for me simply on the fear others may not be happy.
I struggled with this because I would get wrapped up in my thoughts thinking that this was selfish, rude, and un-yogic like.
But it was yoga which taught me caring for myself and living my life in the best light I can, the way I feel I am called to do is how you can best care for others.
Here are five things that come to mind when I reflect on my own self-confidence and what helped me cultivate it.
5 Ways to Boost Self-Confidence:
- Learn to be Uncomfortable. First on the yoga mat with poses, then in life with people. Just sitting with emotions, breathing, and letting things pass.
- Use Your Voice. First through teaching, sharing my point of view with the understanding that others may not agree. Then in life, at first little things, and when someone would disagree, letting that conversation be, and not recanting myself to appease the other person.
- Began to Ask Yourself What Feels Good to Me. Not one thing is going to be 100% right for everyone. No diet, no exercise, not even yoga. And knowing that is OK, there is no need to convince someone of your practice or lifestyle.
- Get Quiet to Get Loud. Not yelling, but to use my voice with confidence I first needed to get real quiet and listen, feel, and process. As someone who would often shoot from the hip in life. This has served me well.
- Realize and Fully Understand That Not Everyone in Life Will like You, and That is OK. I know some of you will feel the need to email me and tell me “I like you”. And I appreciate that, but it’s not necessary. I have found great strength in others not liking me, not agreeing with me, or flat out rejecting me. It has been one of my best muscle builders to help my light shine bright.
So today, let your light shine bright. Let it beam with self-confidence. Don’t worry a thing about whose eyes may not like it. Shine baby, shine and let your self confidence burn bright!
From my heart to yours,
Hope
by hope | Jun 30, 2022 | Inspirational, Mental Health
What is your relationship with yourself?
It may seem like an odd question as most people focus on their relationships with their loved ones or friends. Yet, believe it or not, according to expert therapists, our relationship with ourselves is disintegrating at an alarming rate. Self-esteem issues are more and more frequent, with approximately 85% of people worldwide struggling with low self-confidence. In other words, the relationship you have with yourself is likely to be wrong, according to statistics.
Why don’t we love ourselves more? According to Baumeister, our concept of self is our understanding of our personal attributes. The better we understand ourselves, the more likely our self-confidence and sense of self-worth will remain intact.
Unfortunately, self-confidence develops in young age, during childhood and adolescence. Therefore, your interactions with your parents and social circle at that age will impact your perception of yourself and, in turn, your self-confidence. Children who receive recognition for their mistakes and achievements are likely to develop into confident adults with healthy self-esteem. On the other hand, if parents expect their child to achieve an impossible level of perfection and are fast to criticize any mistakes, the child is prone to feel inadequate, not good enough, and not worthy of self-love.
If you’ve grown up in a situation where you have received unfair criticism, you probably find it tough to make peace with some of your personal attributes. But it is never too late for a wake-up call. Learning to love yourself starts today.
Unsplash – CC0 License
Recover from criticism about your physical appearance
Have you grown up being the chubby kid or the one with the uneven smile? Being at the receiving end of hurtful jokes, even from friends and family, can make it hard to make peace with your appearance. So, finding an objective interlocutor to discuss your worries is essential. I was that kid that others joked about, and it hurt. In middle school, I tried to laugh it off like it was no big deal, but in truth, it was, and it impacted me for years afterward.
Indeed, if you have experienced people making fun of you for some of your physical features, it can be tough to see the real you behind the painful comments. For example, someone who might have been on the heavy side during their school years may still see the image of their old overweight self in the mirror, even though they have long lost all the excess weight. So, the first step in healing your self-esteem is to find someone who will be honest with you and help you. Reaching out to a specialist, such as asking a dentist about your smile, is the surest way to hear an objective answer. More importantly, a specialist can also help you understand your options if you wish to improve features you are uncomfortable with. For example, a dentist could recommend using composite bonding to cover chipped teeth. Or perhaps finding help with getting fit and losing weight from Thetribestm.com is the best option for you. Think about what will help most and make a move in that direction. Making peace with your appearance doesn’t necessarily mean accepting traits you are unhappy about. Things can be changed, and transformations have proven instrumental in re-learning self-love.
by hope | Aug 5, 2021 | Lifestyle, Mental Health
Your health is the key to your confidence. If you are looking after your health in the best possible way, you will feel at your best. Many people don’t understand this, which is why they are currently not leading a healthy lifestyle or feeling confident in themselves. In this article, we’re going to be looking at how you can take care of your health, enhancing your confidence in the process. We wish you the very best of luck.
Exercise
The first thing that you will need to do is to ensure that you are completing a good amount of exercise. The last thing that you want is to be a couch potato. There is nothing worse, and your muscles are only going to weaken over time. Eventually, you’re not going to be able to use them in the way you once were, and you may even need physiotherapy to get back some of the function in them. So today, get up and get moving, who cares how, you will be so glad you did.
You don’t have to head out and join a gym at this point, but you can go for walks, go swimming, practice yoga start running, or join a gym if you want to. You have plenty of options for how you can get your exercise, so don’t feel as though there is only one way to do this.
Food
You should also be thinking about the food that you are consuming. Not just what you are eating, but how much of it you are eating. You need to understand that even if you are eating healthy food, too much of it is bad for you. That’s why you shouldn’t sit there and eat three or four apples at a time (that’s craziness, and more does not equal better). You should only be eating the right amount for yourself, learn to listen to your body, ensuring that you get all the vitamins and nutrients you need.
If you’re not sure how to cook well for healthy food, there are plenty of recipes online that will help you out here. Don’t let not knowing get in the way of you eating healthy. Start simple, and start small.
Extra Help
Finally, you might need a little extra help depending on what will help with your confidence. If it is weight loss, then you may want to consider surgery in the form of gastric lap band surgery. This helps you lose weight, and when you are all healed, you’re going to feel like a new person. If you need extra help with some other area of your health, then you might want to speak to a personal trainer.
We hope you have found this article helpful and now see some of the things you can do to get your confidence back. A lot of people don’t understand that their health is the key to their confidence, and that is what they need to work on. When this happens, all kinds of areas are going to be improved. Your confidence is one of them. We wish you the very best of luck and hope that you will take this advice.
by Hope Zvara | May 29, 2016 | Inspirational
SMILE. Today is going to be an amazing day!! Your alive and breathing!
It is easy to feel that life is just not on your side, but know that how the world feels has a lot to do with how you look at it.
For so many years I hated myself, I did not like who I was, I had very little self-confidence and very little self-esteem, despite the confidence I projected.
It is O.K. to love yourself and show it, to love yourself and tell the world! Hiding underneath your pillow because you don’t feel like you match up to the rest is sad and totally unnecessary!
Today is a new day! Today is a great day!
Today you have a lot to smile about!
In order to offer authentic love out to the world loving yourself and heck even just starting out by just liking yourself without the need for others approval is essential for life to become even sweeter!
So today I want to invite you to name (list) at least 5 great things about yourself. AND post a fun-loving selfie!!
Love Yourself! xx
Feel like you can’t do it-I want you to move through the discomfort and do it anyway. I struggled for years not sharing myself fully because I cared too much what others thought of me.
Never feel bad about loving who you are!…
So here are my five things I love about myself (there are more, but here is 5)!
1. I’m super funny
2. I have a load of inspiration to share
3. I think outside the box
4. I’ve learned from my mistakes
5. I see life as a journey and one worth giving your all in!!
What about you??
Leave a comment below with your selfie and the five things you love about yourself. Is your mind saying “no”? Move through the discomfort and put yourself out there!
Make sure you subscribe to my blog so you never miss a #DailyDoseOfHope!
by hope | Sep 4, 2019 | Lifestyle
What’s in my gym bag?
A few years back I broke down and started to go to the gym. And what I mean by that is, I bought a gym membership. Yes, the girl who can workout at home. Who know exactly what to do and dislikes weight equipment-bought a gym membership?
I’m a Midwestern girl and Wisconsin winters were really beginning to get to me. I mean, I hit 30 and suddenly this who seasonal affective disorder thing became real. Like MEGA real.
But upon buying this gym membership I noticed something that really didn’t click for me even after fifteen years teaching on the yoga mat. – What you wear does matter.
I mean I am not here to say that $200 yoga pants make for a better workout than $20 yoga pants. But what I realized is showing up in a top and shorts or yoga pants that made me feel good. And heck, looked good in those huge wall size mirrors did help for my motivation to stick around a little longer and work a little harder.
Now my yoga studio of 14 years did not have mirrors (for good reason). And this little discovery made me begin to do a little self-reflection. And sure enough, the days I try to do my hair a bit, wear mascara and yes coordinate my outfit for teaching yoga-made a huge difference.
Now don’t get me wrong, I would never EVER discriminate against anyone who would walk through my doors at my studio and surely never ever at the gym. Wear whatever you want. Coming is the most important. But my own personal observation made me think a bit deeper into the psyche of why we do what we do.
What if a quick trip to Walmart (because heck, they have cute workout clothes) and $30 spent could boost your energy, moral, and motivation to take better care of you? And I’ll save you muttering in your head back at me in this post where you tell me telepathically that you don’t have $30 to spend. Because I bet my four-year-old sons little bear Milky that you could easily find $30 when you look back at what you are buying, spending, wasting money on.
And I say this with love, because a few years back I got into the habit of calling myself out on the blame game routine I was taught from childhood. And wouldn’t you know I found that $30 in a snap!
Ok this post isn’t about where you are spending your money (that for another day) this is all about what to wear to workout. And why that matters more than you think. Here are my favorite workout looks and my absolute essentials for at home, at the gym and travel.
These are my NON-NEGOTIABLES and MUST HAVE workout gear!
What if your journey starts here?
With one new outfit. Feeling good one move at a time? Let’s shop!
For yoga, Pilates & Dance –
Well most of you all know yoga is my love. Yoga saved my life. Yoga is a big part of my style. Yoga is probably my favorite workout next to long walks countryside. Yoga is the biggest reason I am healthy, fit and feel great. I am in love with a good part of yoga capris. You know, the ones that hit just above the ankle and hug to your body. Not because I want to show off my legs. But because I hate interference. I dislike with a passion my belly rolling over my pants. The butt of my pants looking saggy and worn out. And I don’t like to feel restrictive in anything I wear.
These yoga capris are from Zyia. Their prices are not Walmart. But they are quite a bit cheaper than Lululemon. So that means you save and look amazing! Plus, their pants will last forever. I mean, come on, this company was started by two mom’s who were sick of the high prices of workout wear and wanted to make clothing that fits real women. – You can sign me up!
To date I’ve literally owned about 100 pairs of yoga bottoms and now I wear all of my 5 pairs from Zyia rotating throughout the week and get compliments everywhere! Best part. The pockets! Yes, those amazing sleek side hip pockets!
Add in a great top to go with. And you got yourself a self confidence booster you can wear out the door.
I used to buy all my bras on the clearance rack. Who needs a good bra? Wow was I wrong. Every woman on the planet needs a good bra. Did those words just come out of my mouth? I know I am talking Zyia-again. But seriously their sports bras with the sheer coverage on top have been a game changer for me.
- Support
- Sexy coverage (sorry not interested in seeing your goods during yoga and not interested in showing you mine).
- Doesn’t look like a “sports” bra
- Washes easily
Shoes?
Well on the yoga mat, no shoes required (but washing your feet is a nice bonus). But when I go to the gym or for my countryside walk (most would say my walk is faster than most people jogging) shoes are a huge decision for me.
Ask my kids and they will tell you if they don’t bend, twist and flex, I’m not buying them. I struggle to find success in those categories for my wide foot and long check list with brands like Nike and Sketchers (sorry I’m not a fan of walking around with pillows under my feet).
But I do love Under Armor Women’s Street Precision Street Shoes. Comfortable and I am not a big fan of overly padded shoes as they mess with my gait (fancy word for stride). I want my foot to feel the ground as much as possible and at the same time taking into consideration the concrete jungle many of us live in.
A little secret to buying shoes for running or the gym. Look on the side of the box and see if it says what they heel support is. Most people don’t catch onto this, but even sports shoes can be a high heeled shoe. This changes your gait, hip and hip muscle activation and response of your body. Not to get off topic, but if you are having running, standing or walking issues, don’t just change your shoes, get pro advice and change how you move. Because the shoes were probably not your first problem.
For outdoor fun –
Did someone say hiking?
Climbing?
Camping?
You may have just described my favorite summer fun! (Yes people I live in the Midwest, we have only 12 weeks of summer to shove all our outdoor fun into before the parkas come out). I am obsessed with a good fanny pack for my cell phone or car keys. And love a great hat. I used to hate wearing ball caps but now that I am a mom of three in my 30’s, it appears your taste in things does change.
When it comes to outdoors, I love layers. And always something I can tie easily around my waist, or even roll up into a small backpack (one of us always has one). I tend to be plain with prints. But being more conscious about my pieces now, I tend to gravitate towards business on the bottom (solid colors) and party on top (quotes, fun images, or prints). I absolutely love Prana’s Graphic Crew Sweatshirt. Soft and cozy, perfect for camping or hiking, or just drinking coffee in my office.
So, what do I actually wear to the gym? Well, you’ll most likely see me there during non-peak hours with a loose pullover sweatshirt or zip up (I hate when my headphones get caught on my top as I’m trying to remove it). And always a tank not a tee, because I don’t like overheating. That cute top mesh bra and always a carpi (the ankle is like the bodies cooling vent). Plus my non-spill water bottle and because my capri’s have a pocket on my hip I have a place for my phone when I’m working it out with free weights in front of the wall size mirrors.
And to be honest, when I see myself as put together, it does truly motivate me to stick around a little longer. And in my book, anything that can help create motivation when I may not have it, is a win for me!
